"I cannot share your grief, because no one could share mine. When one of your children goes out of your life, you think what he might have done with a few more years and you wonder what you are going to do with the rest of yours. Then one day, because there is a world to be lived in, you find yourself a part of it again, trying to accomplish something-something that he did not have time enough to do. And, perhaps, that is the reason for it all." Joe Kennedy

The World Can be a Shining Light when it Wants To.....

$58 Million and counting. That's how much the Hope for Haiti telethon made over the weekend. The Red Cross 90999 text campaign has just surpassed $21 Million.

Apparently that does not include all the single big whig donors (like the Silver Fox) or any corporations.

That's the goodness of millions of normal, every day people around the world, who for one moment gave what they could.

It reminds me of a quote by Mother Teresa: "It is not the magnitude of our actions but the amount of love that is put into them that matters."

It shows that when we each contribute one little action; One Dollar, One Hour, One Thought, it creates something big. It makes me wonder what else we would be able to accomplish if we took this idea to heart. Made it work in difficult times and in joyous ones.

I had decided early on in the week that I wasn't going to eat out at lunch, save that money and donate it on Friday, I have to admit, it wasn't such a big sacrifice since I worked from home most of the week, but I wanted to be able to give, even a little bit.

I have to admit, it felt good, and I already feel like I've been blessed two times over.

He Had a Dream....

Yesterday was MLK Jr. Day.

In honor of this courageous man and his call to service, I spent the evening at the Ronald McDonald House in SF.

There were five of us altogether and our mission:

To cook dinner for the 10 families that were currently staying at the house.

Yes. You read that correctly. I'm making food.

For other people.

As of right now, the majority of the families have preemie babies at the hospital. Some stay for over 6 months.

I can't even imagine. That is such a long time away from home, such a long time having a child in the hospital.

So, at 6pm we gathered. We had pots in hand, pans greased up, oven heated. Except for the fact that I have very little cooking skills, I feel like the night went well. We made two pots of hearty chili, cornbread, salad and rice krispy treats.

I was in charge of making the cornbread and by golly, I wasn't going to let anything happen to those two pans of goodness.

I was nervous though. I've never made homemade cornbread from scratch.

That's right folks. Scratch.

As soon as we finished, and the spicy aroma was filtering through the house, the families started to arrive. There were a few moms, some dads, sibilings. There was even a new family who had just checked in that night.

It made me wonder what the first night is like.

I pray for those who have to find out and hope that I never do.

Life's Reminders

I can't help but watch the news these days and wonder "why?"

Why are we so lucky and others so misfortune?
Why does it feel like those who are already hit hard, always hit even harder?
Why does it take something so big, to make me realize how much I have to be thankful for?

So in honor of this little reminder, I've made a list. Because as you know, I love lists.

1. I'm thankful that I have safe drinking water that runs right to my house, even though I foolishly buy bottled.

2. I'm thankful that I have access to hospitals, doctors and medical care, regardless of the rising co-pay, scary needles and annoying insurance companies.

3. I'm thankful I know where my family and friends are, even if I sometimes forget how important a simple phone call to say hello can be.

4. I'm thankful that I have an education, and as tiresome and as expensive as that little piece of paper was, I'm glad I listened to my Grandfather, because no one can take that away from me.

5. I'm thankful for my job, even if it is causing me to gray prematurely. When it comes down to it...I'm doing what I love and loving what I'm doing.

6. I'm thankful I can sing, dance, shout, whenever and where ever I please. Some people will never be so lucky.

7. I'm thankful today is sunny. I'm thankful I can feel and see the warmth. I'm thankful my world, today, is normal and safe. All I have to do is turn on the tv to realize we are blessed.

8. I'm thankful I have an overabundance of food, even though I hate to cook. I'm sad that I so easily can waste it and not even blink an eye.

9. I'm thankful I can openly believe in a God that I know has watched over me my entire life. I am not thankful for people like Pat Robertson who uses their "influence" to blame innocent people for things they had no control over.

10. I'm thankful for all the people who have helped me get to where I am today. I'm thankful for my mentors, my family, and my friends.

2009: The Year that Was. 2010: The Year that Is.

I tried hard to make a few new goals this year. However, to be honest, it wasn't working out.

I feel like last year I lost a bit of myself. The fall of 09 really took a lot out of me. I was so incredibly unhappy on the road. I felt isolated and completely disconnectd. I felt like I was drowning in the tears I cried almost every day. I literally was living each day just hoping to survive till the next one. I wanted to be grounded, but all I could think of was how easy it would be to run away.

And you call me a Drama Queen?

Looking back, it makes me laugh a bit because nothing I lived through was that bad compared to others in this world. I'm lucky.I'm blessed. I've always been supported and loved, but, in 2009 I forgot all that. It's funny how you can go through life miserable, just to look back and realize it wasn't that bad after all.

So instead of making a list of things to do, I decided on changing my outlook.

I really want to live this year. Really Breathe it. Take it in, Devour it.

As much as I struggle with my job, I realize how blessed I am to have it. I live a golden girl life. I travel all over the great state of CA and someone else foots most of the bill. It's not perfect, but it is amazing. I think about all the places I've seen, all the people I've met and know that it wouldn't have happened otherwise.

I realized this past month that I know deep down inside, I will not be a road warrior forever. This year, I'm really going to enjoy it.

***On a side note, I know it's a bit late to be doing a birthday round up. Heck, I turned 27 over a month ago. I'm practically 28, however I realized a few days ago that for the past 6 years, I've celebrated my birthday in 6 different locations.

This is a trend I like.



22:Pullman, WA

23:Seattle, WA

24: Osaka, Japan

25: Indianapolis, IN

26: San Francisco, CA

27: Salamanca, Spain



I wonder where 28 will take me.

It's a long time coming....

Well, I must admit that I have clearly abandoned this blog whilst in pursuit of other things.

And what excuse do I have?

I could say life got in the way (but that's overdone)

I could say I've lost my will to write (but that would be untrue)

I could say the holidays really took a lot out of me (but then I'd have to count all the way back to July and that's pretty desperate).

So instead I will say nothing at all.

That is why today. Jan. 13th, 2010 Iam taking a stand.

2010 will be the year of no excuses.

Today I pledge to write more, eat less, explore more, shop less (which will be hard with the new mega Esprit store moving into downtown SF), love more, give more and be more.... all while continuing to earn Southwest Frequent Flier miles along the way.

2010 is panning out to be a good year.

I can feel it in my fingers. I feel it in my toes....